Travelling down this long lonely road into West Texas from Arizona for my mother's memorial service in Big Bend National Park was one of the most difficult journeys I have faced alone and it was travelled literally under a Dark Cloud.
I had finished weeks of sorting through her things and was bringing some of them to distribute to family members, so the rental car was loaded down with many of her most precious possessions: her memorabilia: family scrapbooks, journals, manuscripts; as well as her craft projects: quilts, dolls, stitchery wall hangings, cards; and boxes of geneological research. It was like my last time to be with her.
The trip was long and required a night in El Paso. A night which was comfortable enough but outside terrible thunderstorms raged and I worried about the precious cargo in the car.
The next day the rain was falling so heavily that I had to pull off the highway several times because of zero visibility. Eventually I drove out of it to learn of major flooding in the National Park. The storms had been stirred up by Hurricane Ike which was due to make landfall in Galveston/Houston that night. Relatives coming in from that direction were also stressed.
And yet when we all woke up the next day, the Park weather was beautiful and allowed many in the group to take a day hike up to the summit of a popular trail and almost all of us made it up to one of Mom's favourite lookouts for a time of remembrance. We were so thankful for the glorious weather that day. I couldn't help but feel her smile in the sunshine.
God reminds us over and over again through nature that after the storm comes the sun. Clouds of life come and go, but there is always light beyond them. Today, as I mark the end of a richly defining era in my life, and hang up my CM consultant badge, I am looking beyond the clouds of sadness knowing that there will be new doors to open and more delights to discover as I live in the light.
The Layout: With so much more media coverage we are now aware of every tragedy around the world in depth and almost as it unfolds. I feel privileged to share this kit, Hope for a Brighter Future, by way of this layout. Some lovely designers at For the Luv of Art created it to raise funds for Red Cross Japan and New Zealand. Please pause to take a look at all the goodies it contains and purchase it for yourself and for a good cause.
Your loving post so touched my heart! My mother died on Mother's Day some years ago. Mother's Day floats, but, still, the association saddens. This year I'm going to remember your post and your clouds. Thank you.
ReplyDeleteAnd congratulations on moving from one successful life stage to another.
Thank you so much Kittie. After such an intense week (and year to date) globally, it brightens my heart to know that sharing memories and thoughts is not in vain and in this case has lifted you up at such a sad time of remembrance. What a dreadful day to lose your mother. I'll be thinking of you this weekend. Bless you.
ReplyDeleteI just wrote a comment and hit the wrong button and it vanished!!!
ReplyDeleteit said something like this....
Oh Lori - you got to me again. Like Kate, my mother died at this time of year (7th May. The memories remain and they are good ones of a long and happy life. I still miss her greatly and wish she was here to see her grandchildren and great grandchildren as they meet the challenges of life.
The heart is mended and I can now smile when I think of her.
I too lost my mother on the Wednesday after mother's day in 2001. I still miss her terribly and know just how hard it is to go through her stuff and sort it. I had a hard time giving away anything of hers.
ReplyDeleteI now mostly remember her with smiles instead of tears, but she is never to far from my thoughts.
I just wish she had had more time with her Grandchildren. She had waited so long to have any, and loved them dearly.
Thanks for your post, it helped bring back memories of Momma for me.
Barbara - it is so sad that we cannot keep these dear women around to know and be known by our own children and grandchildren, much less to maintain our own relationship with them. We so want to share the best things in life with them, don't we! We were blessed. :)
ReplyDeletePam - Yes, the sorting, tossing and dispersing is an indescribably journey of varied emotions. May you feel especially warmed by your memories at this time. My children, because of distance, did not really get to know her and I mourned that truth for years. And yet when the time came they were deeply grieved. Just proves that love can even break through such barriers, as we honour them. Thanks for sharing with me. May your remembrances be sweet this weekend.
ReplyDeleteYour family members will appreciate the remembrances of your Mother. It's a difficult period for you but she will always be with you, just as mine is with me. I'm here on the shout-out of Kittie. I enjoy your writing.
ReplyDeleteManzanita@Wannabuyaduck
Thank you for your kind words Manzanita - and for visiting and following my blog. It is lovely to welcome you. You are right, a good mother plants herself in the hearts of her children to forever bloom there.
ReplyDelete